I can’t be the only one.
We all have those nights.
The kids are sound asleep in their beds and we check on them, only to be reminded just how lucky we are to have such amazing little miracles entrusted to us.
Your significant other is down for the count, snoring the night away on their side of the bed… Why is it always easier to love them when they are asleep?!
The dishes have long been cleaned up from dinner, and the last load of laundry finished drying hours ago.
Yet here we sit.
The clock currently reads 12:37am.
With each passing minute I am more acutely aware that it is one more minute closer to when my household will wake up.
One more minute closer to when I will have to turn on my A-game and be mom, photographer, business woman, cook, instructor, financial guru, maid, referee, friend… The list goes on!
With so many tasks looming on the horizon, why, you may ask, am I not asleep?!
That’s a great question.
I was recently chatting with one of my dear friends about how we always feel the need to be superwoman and do everything for everybody. But in reality: we can’t. We just end up getting burned out and are not able to take care of anyone.
I don’t know about you, but I have a LOT going on right now.
In my personal life, there are a lot of scary things happening. Changes that I know have been in the works for a long time, but now that they are coming to a head, I feel very anxious about it.
In my business, I’m not necessarily where I want to be at the end of February. As someone who relies on photography to pay the bills, this can be a scary feeling. If you let it, all the “what-ifs” will quickly consume you.
I feel like, all around me, everyone is doing amazing things: they are über successful in their careers, have a perfectly spotless house at all times, their children never misbehave (or talk back!), and they have the perfect relationship with their spouse, and eat only the most organic and healthy foods.
Is this an accurate portrayal?
For most people, probably not (and if the previous paragraph describes you, call me, because I wanna know your secret!).
But with all these big changes coming down the bend, it would be nice to know I’m not the only one struggling to keep my head above water.
That I’m not the only one to go to bed with a dozen more things still to cross off their to-do list.
That I’m not the only one who questions whether this is truly the right path to be on.
That I’m not the only one who worries about causing permanent and irreparable damage to their kids.
That I’m not the only one who doesn’t have it all together.
That I’m not the only one.
You are not the only one beautiful friend. We are all taking huge giant leaps when it comes to being full time in this business. I so admire you and your honesty. Praying for you! Have courage, do your thang!
Not alone at all hon! Being so great at all you do and still worrying about how to do it better is the curse of a woman. Especially as a mom, we strive so hard for others, but mostly our children. You are doing great! But the next night you are alone with your thoughts at midnight, remember… I, along with many others, lay awake with many of your same thoughts, concerns, and worries. It’s part of who we are. 🙂